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83 | Faith with Chance - Tia & Martino Gedeus

Tia described the moment when faced with an X-ray needed after a cough sent her to the ER. She was informed that it was cancer after a follow up with a pulmonologist. Leading her down a road of testing, treatment, and specialists. All moving at a fast pace to provide immediate treatment. Tia was diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma, and she immediately felt herself come outside of her body. She began inpatient chemotherapy treatment for the cancer.They utilized all of the medications, including those that would cross through the placenta, because she didn’t just want to survive the pregnancy and raise her child.

Tia and Martino’s birth would culminate with an emergency surgical birth at 31 weeks pregnant due to the baby having repeated heart decelerations after mom passed a large blood clot. Their hospital stay was brief due to her weakened immune system, but she quickly returned the next day due to a fever that would later be determined as lung inflammation.

Postpartum was challenging, as one might imagine. Their family stepped in to visit Baby Chance in the NICU as Tia healed and Martino took care of her and their other daughter. Yes, the baby was named Chance because they gave him a chance at life. Tia and Martino’s story goes beyond birth; it is a testament to their faith, strength, determination, favor, and love.

81 | Learn How to Overcome Your Fears About Childbirth & Birth Like a Boss - Dayna Ruben

Dayna Ruben’s grandmother had nine children in the Caribbean islands, all homebirths. During her pregnancy, she thought about her a lot, and her first son was born on her birthday, where she would have been 100 years old. Dayna felt deeply connected to her ancestors and the groundwork that would lead her through her pregnancies. She incorporated hypnobirthing as a deep way to tap into her subconscious and have the births they desired. Both pregnancies were without issues and concerns.

Labor ensued slowly as she started dilating on a Monday and would have her membranes naturally rupture (water break) on Thursday. She took her time to prepare herself to leave. She followed the hypnosis scripts that she had been listening to in her sleep, which allowed her to stay calm despite when her surges (contractions) were 5 minutes apart as they left their home. Dayna arrived at 10 centimeters dilated, and her support team was ready to receive her. Unfortunately, they weren’t receptive to her requests, which was frustrating for Dayna. She delivered her baby feeling empowered and knowing she could have done it at home. Her first birth would lead her through a journey of self-discovery and influence her second birth.

Having two births grounded in calm and connection to her body, Dayna now supports other birthing persons in achieving a blissful birth experience without fear.

Hospital Birth, Home Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierDecember 3, 2020Comment

76 | A Journey Towards Healing: Motherhood After Loss - Alishia Anderson

This is a story about loss - In memory of Derek Jerrell Anderson Jr., aka DJ

Alishia Anderson shares that motherhood has stretched her in ways she didn't even know she could be stretched. That the lessons she has taken from her journey are that "motherhood is very unpredictable, and having living children is an underrated blessing!"

Her motherhood journey was turned upside down as within her first pregnancy at 28 weeks, during a routine ultrasound appointment, they discovered her son no longer had a heartbeat. Needing time to process, Alishia and her husband decided to move forward with induction for the next day. That evening they prepared to meet their son, researching what it meant to lose a baby this early, the name for their experience, and trying to gain some sense of what to expect. After three days of labor, she gave birth to her angel baby Derrek Jerrell Anderson Jr., aka DJ. The groundwork that a supportive nurse provided in helping her understand the reality of what postpartum would look like as a stillbirth survivor was something Alishia found to be fundamental in finding healing and also navigating becoming a parent again.

A year later, Alisha and her husband would add their rainbow baby Grayson to their family and their golden baby Gavin two and a half years after that. And each story bringing its twists and turns but embracing everything within them.

67 | A Mother Who Meditates - Kristen Hanna

Kristen felt moved to share her birth story with BSIC as she felt it uniquely provided a space for women of color to be open and raw. Kristen became aware of her first pregnancy while traveling in Northern Africa. She managed to acquire prenatal care there, despite language barriers. Eventually, she transitioned back to the states still within the pregnancy and decided to hire a midwife for a home birth due to her late gestational age. Kristen’s view of pregnancy as being an expansive experience helped her take on the challenges of pregnancy. She maintained her regular routine and interests, which helped her later invite her new baby into their family. When her Labor Day arrived, she found herself being called to task about her own beliefs in meditation and the power of the mind.

Her daughter’s birth led her to start Blissful Birth Yoga, focusing her practice on prenatal support. She uses her personal experience and skills to support women and birthing people for the physical, mental, and emotional portions of labor. Kristen and her partner found themselves expecting another child and are preparing by letting the pregnancy flow, knowing that anything could change along the way. We look forward to part two of Kristen’s journey through motherhood after her son arrives.

Home Birth, COVID-19, PostpartumLaurel GourrierSeptember 24, 2020Meditation, Mindfulness, Prenatal Yoga, Pregnancy Meditation, Postpartum Mental HealthComment

66 | Universal Language - Heather Gallagher

In thinking about what she wanted for her birth, she wanted it to be full of choices and led by her voice. For Heather, that meant a strong birth team of doulas and midwives, having a homebirth, and following her body and baby's lead. At about 45 weeks, after a walk under the full moon, Heather's water broke, and things began moving pretty fast. After laboring for about four to five hours, Heather was pushing, yet she would be stopped suddenly by her midwife, expressing to her that they would need to head to the hospital, making it clear that this was an emergency. Her son's head was stuck behind her pelvis and would need support from forceps for his arrival.

Heather's postpartum journey has had its hills and valleys. Dealing with postpartum depression and anxiety for about three and a half to four years, a diagnosis that she didn't get until her son was two and a half - " I knew I was in it, but I didn't know what it was, I just thought this was my new normal." While also working through her mental health, she was navigating her nursing journey. Due to the forceps, her son needed cranial sacral therapy to get his jaw back in alignment, impacting his beginning of nursing. But they were able to find their rhythm until he was about five and a half. A dance they worked through continuously figuring out what worked for them. All of this is a testament to her spectrum of life, an aspect that Heather takes into her work.

Heather considers herself a full spectrum photography - documenting all facets and stages of life, from the time you enter the world, through the life you lead, and upon your transition into death. Understanding the vulnerability and trust needed for capturing these experiences with authenticity, Heather's work is "extremely inclusive, empathetic and intimate" aspects that she also takes to support families as a full spectrum doula again honoring life and death. She is hoping that with her new project within Life's a Spectrum, she can unveil new parts for people about themselves. An ability to look at the layers of their life, the emotions they have carried, where they set their boundaries and limits, but most importantly, what's their center and where they always come back to.

64 | Sudden Change - Chelsie Washington

A couple of days after her estimated due date, Chelsie went into spontaneous labor - arriving at the hospital dilated to two centimeters. However, due to her membranes' length of time being ruptured and not dilating further, Chelsie and her husband decided the safest option was to bring their son, Wade, earthside via a c-section. Chelsie attributes that decision as her first big parenting decision, and as they navigated the first month of their son's life, she and her husband would soon need to make another big decision.

Chelsie had been noticing Wade was always eating. Beyond the regular cluster feeding, this observation and an irregular breathing pattern that her mother in law had picked up on were a nudge for her to bring their pediatrician aware. While he had been doing well during all his regular checkups, their pediatrician did find a slight heart murmur and referred them to a specialist to see at a later date during a follow-up appointment. Yet again, following the encouragement of her mother in law, they decided to fast track his care. They went into Children's Hospital for in-depth testing; assessments during their visit provided them with a diagnosis that their son had a heart defect - aortic coarctation. If receiving care was prolonged, he would go into organ failure. Without an extended amount of time to consider the news, Chelsie and her husband found themselves preparing Wade for heart surgery.

Wade is currently thriving; beyond the scar from his surgery, you wouldn't even know the extent of his journey - the extent of their journey as a family. Sharing her birth, her postpartum healing, and the role of her village support Chelsie reminds all us, parents, that while our children are meeting their milestones, we are as well. Growing and changing alongside them, and even in that growth's roughest patches, things always get better.

Hospital Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierSeptember 10, 2020Comment

61 | Blooming Mamas Wellness - Bianca Marie

With a relatively easy pregnancy, six weeks before her EDD, she didn't automatically think the cramping she was feeling, and an abnormal gush of water was her being in labor. Throughout the next couple of days, she went about her routine but did schedule an appointment with her OB to ensure all was well. Her doctor instructed her that her day would be taking a turn during her visit, and it was best she head to the hospital. At the hospital, Bianca and her husband were shocked to find that not only did her water break at some point, and she was 5cm dilated.

Throughout the day, they found the staff supportive and receptive to her fiance being a strong advocate for Bianca. It wasn't until the shift change, and when they decided to move forward with an Epidural, that care began to shift. Bianca and her fiance started feeling rushed by the nurses, and a lack of attention to details. During the placement of her epidural, the tech created a chaotic situation. That not only caused stress and fear for Bianca and her fiance but was overly dismissive of the harm they caused and the effects that had for the rest of Bianca's birth.

Her story is a reminder of the sacredness of birth. That those who have the honor to be a part of that space treat it with respect it deserves. No matter how many births as birth workers, support systems, and care providers we have attended or supported, each one is new for each family. It is a privilege to hold space for them because your birth is an experience you carry for a lifetime!

60 | The Power of Trust - Nicole Bailey

When submitting her story, Nicole was concerned that she wouldn't have "enough" to share. That her story would be unrelatable to others, but of course, that's not the case! Nicole had been apprehensive about being a parent and knew from the beginning that she would need to prepare herself not only physically, but also mentally and spiritually. Prep began with creating a birthing team that could support her fully. She immersed herself in birth videos and birth. She continued with her active lifestyle and took extra precaution and care by seeing a Chiropracter to ensure her body and baby were in alignment. Nicole also relied heavily on affirmations, whenever fear or distractions would come up she would affirm aloud that her baby knew what to do, she knew what to do, and they both were going to be able to do this together.

Labor began on Mother's day - and the word that arose for Nicole in describing her story was "surreal." Throughout, there was a deep connection to what her baby needed. Almost like a pull, "I felt like I was somewhere trying to retrieve my baby." After laboring at home for 10 hours, she felt an intense urge that her baby was ready to come and arrived at the hospital at 9 cm dilated. Nicole would stay tapped into her connectedness and intuition until her baby was earthside in 3 pushes.

59 | On Babies Time - Milan Sanders

Milan's pregnancy started during her last semester of college, which was a busy season of her life. She fearfully shared her news with her mother and was surprised that her mother was supportive, and it became an opportunity for them to bond. Her mother wanted to be present every step of the way, and it was in this space that her mother held space for her to make a significant decision within motherhood.

She prepared for birth with her partner by attending a childbirth education class, which they found helpful. She set in her mind to have an unmedicated birth after learning of the potential effects on her baby. When Milan finally went into labor, she contacted Labor & Delivery when her contractions/surges were 3-1-1 (3 minutes apart, lasting 1 minute, for an hour). The nurse didn’t believe she was in labor and told her to stay home. She waited a few hours and went to the hospital when she could no longer speak during contractions/surges. When she arrived, she had not dilated, the doctor gave her morphine without her consent and sent her home. When she arrived back home, things shifted so quickly that an unplanned home birth became imminent. Milan’s experience is not unique as some women dilate quickly, and even more common is a provider not performing a proper cervical check. She spoke up and advocated for herself but still had challenges being heard. Milan encourages women to continue to speak up for themselves.

57 | The Body Holds the Score - Alicia & Solomon Tetteh

When they went in for the birth of their twins, Alicia and Solomon did not expect it to be three days - three days filled with all the emotions. As they worked through multiple induction methods, a failed epidural, and a lengthy pushing time, Solomon could feel in his spirit that something was off. In discussions with the doctor on the third day, Solomon's suspicions were confirmed as the doctor indicated the trajectory they were on was unsafe. A surgical birth would be the best option for Alicia and the twins.

Healing from their experience didn't happen immediately and took community support. Alicia and Solomon tapped into their families, supported each other through individual and couples therapy. And maintaining the foundation, they had created of always checking in with each other and speaking on their feelings. As we learned during Black Maternal Health Week, statistics show that up to 20 percent of birthing parents develop a perinatal mental health illness, such as depression, anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder, or psychosis, either during pregnancy or the year after giving birth and sometimes beyond. For black birthing parents, that risk is doubled. With Alicia and Solomon's story, we also hear the impact and ways mental health can have on partners. As we prepare to grow our families, we must also remember that it's not just about the physical shifts but also the mental.

56 | Stay the Course - Gabrielle Burks

From the beginning, Gabrielle and her fiance knew with the birth of their son; they were going to do things differently this time around. They hired a doula, hired a midwife, and began preparing for their homebirth. Yet seven months into their pregnancy, they were hit with the news that their midwife wouldn't be able to support them, and they had to go back to the drawing board. They visited different hospitals until they found one that felt right and enrolled in a nine-week intensive birth class. In this class, not only did they learn about childbirth but how to control their care, work with sand speak with their care providers to ensure that all decisions were based on and from informed consent. The lessons learned from this class would be vital in their advocacy and care during and after their son's birth.

Her son was born, but not breathing - care providers eventually revived him, but due to the length of time he was without oxygen, they were unsure if he would make it through the night. Gabrielle made that doctor eat his words, pray with her and her family, and demanded that no stone go unturned in her son's care. Her experience highlights the dark parts of birth, the parts we hope never happen, and yet it brings forth what can happen when you have the pieces to be empowered and use them fully.

55 | Vaginal Birth After Laparoscopic Myomectomy - Mabel Bashorun

July is Fibroid Awareness Month - studies show that Black women suffer from fibroids 2-3 times more than white women and tend to experience fibroids at a younger age and often more severely. With those numbers, Black women are also 2 to 3 times more likely to undergo surgery to manage their fibroids. With such a common occurrence, few women are open about their experience, know about treatment options, or what options they have after having a myomectomy.

At 26 years old, Mabel found out that she had fibroids, which she would never have expected. Researching and working with her care provider, shebdecided the best option for her would be to get her fibroids removed through surgery. Knowing that she and her husband would want to expand their family, she decided to move forward with laparoscopic myomectomy. A minimally invasive procedure to remove fibroids, but also provides a better chance for having vaginal births.

Whether it be abdominal or laparoscopic, most myomectomy candidates are not offered a trial of labor. When she found out she was pregnant, Mabel was aware of the odds, but standing firm in her wants and needs, she went through a dozen no's before meeting a doctor who was willing to step out of his comfort zone and support her. This episode covers a myriad of topics; diastasis recti, pelvic floor health, fibroids, blood transfusions, hemorrhaging, drawing boundaries with family, but most importantly, advocating for ourselves as Mabel puts it "having the nerve" to stand up and demand what we want.

52 | Birthing Love - Coach Cass

Learning all they could to help plan for their child's birth was very important for Cass and her husband. Yet they felt that when their questions and concerns were brought to their care provider, they were either ignored or dismissed. Her provider's attitude toward her wanting to explore traditional birthing methods against the usual hospital protocols proved to be a deciding factor in the shift of her care. Making a tough decision, at 33 weeks, Cass and her husband transferred their care to a midwife. Their plan shifted to a birthing center that allowed her to create an environment and team that met the needs of her birth vision. Cass focused on how important it was to sit with her midwife, go through her transferred records, how much it meant to her to be heard, and have her time-honored. Join us and listen in for an empowering story of controlling what you can, educating yourself, and building your birth dream team.

51 | When Your Birth Doesn't Stick to the Plan - Cassandre Dunbar

While she knew she shouldn't make comparisons, around 37 weeks while pregnant with her second son, Cassandre began questioning what to expect. Around this time with her first, she was already showing signs for his arrival. An earlier incident in the pregnancy had caused some uneasiness, a feeling that didn't fade, and by 39 weeks at her regularly scheduled apt, she made sure to advocate strongly that every test be ran to ensure everything was ok. Results yielded that nothing directly was concerning, and showing no signs of being in labor Cassandre went home. Little did she know that in a couple of hours, they would be headed to the hospital via ambulance, and upon arrival birthing her son in one push - but there were some complications. He was not breathing, and due to not knowing how long he had been without oxygen and other symptoms, he was placed in a medically induced coma for three days to preserve brain function. It was a wild ride of anticipation of would this work, but he was able to recover and come home with his family. Cassandre describes their experience as a miracle. While the early journey of postpartum was an adjustment, it welded many lessons for their family, all rooted in leaning into their intuitions and the unexpected. Cassandre's wish is that all who listen to her story, don't see it as a scary experience but a source to remind you always to trust yourself.

Cassandre is also the creator and host of the podcast Be Well Sis, a podcast centered around wellness for black women. When speaking about wellness, black women tend to be erased from those conversations. Be Well, Sis, black women, their voices, and experiences are centered. To connect in community with Cassandre's head over to her website or follow her via social media (@bewellsis_podcast)

50 | Birthing Our Ancestors - Barakah Sahaiel

This is a story about loss - miscarriage & abortion.

Barakah Sahaiel is a multi-faceted artist and birth worker who shared her personal experiences with pregnancy. She had a public passing of her fetus that she kept a secret for two years - personal shame kept her from sharing until she started Birthing Our Ancestors with her best friend. Sharing her stories of abortion and miscarriage (spontaneous and elective abortions) and finding new language to describe her experiences helped her release and begin to heal. Barakah was able to reframe her mindset and release herself from the shame that some mothers who have miscarried continue to carry with them.

Birthing Our Ancestors was born and became Barakah’s healing space. They invited women and men to engage in group therapy and conversation surrounding pregnancy loss. The sessions include a meal, group therapy, open dialogue, and an art project that supports womb trauma. Birthing Our Ancestors celebrates the connection between the spiritual and physical world of birthing both life and death.

46 | A Healing Unmedicated Hospital Birth - Tonya Rapley

An essential intention of Tonya's life is the ability to live freely. This intention is how she prepared for her birth. Knowing she wanted her husband to have an active role in her support. They utilized the Bradley Birth method of childbirth education, as it as a focus on an unmedicated approach using partners as birthing coaches. Having financial freedom allowed her to build a birth team that matched her and her husband's vision. Tonya not only had a black OBGYN but also supported in care from her black midwife. Combining both traditional medical practices with the traditional midwifery care, provided her with the security that nothing be left unturned.

This combination of care would turn out to be exactly the right setup. When Tonya began labor, her OBGYN informed her that he was in the bay area celebrating the Thanksgiving holiday with his family. Meaning there was a strong possibility he would not be present for her birth. Even with his absence, Tonya, her husband, and midwife were able to walk into the hospital with confidence. Especially since the hospital and nurses were familiar with her midwife. Not only familiar with her presence, but in how she approached her interactions to ensure her families were thoroughly cared for. Tonya attributes her midwife's active role in assisting her in having a successful hospital birth. For her, that teamwork allowed "My birth team to advocate for me the way I would if I wasn't in such a vulnerable space." As black-birthing people, we are continually receiving negative messages about our births and their outcomes, especially when we choose to birth in hospitals. Tonya's birth story is a testament that we can have happy, healthy, and healing births.

44 | Birthed From the Heart - Tara Clifton

Tara found out she was pregnant during her sophomore year of college and immediately was met with shame. Coming from a family that wasn't fond of her experience and attending a predominantly white Christian college, she spent most of her pregnancy in isolation, not talking about it and shutting herself into her dorm room.The dismissal of her journey also showed up during the birth of her daughter. Her doctor and nurses ignored her wishes and were forceful in their approach, resulting in Tara's explaining a traumatic birth experience.

Feeling a sense of loss from who she was before her baby, both physically and how she could live her life, Tara is clear that she suffered from postpartum depression. After an incident, Tara knew a change needed to happen. In a Facebook mother's group, she began sharing her story, finding that she wasn't alone in her experience and that others connected with her. She shared more, hoping that by doing so, others wouldn't go through the same thing, but she also found healing in sharing.

We leave every episode with lessons, and Tara's were;

"Don't allow your truth to be silenced because it makes other people uncomfortable." - Tara Clifton
The importance and value of community birth workers with similar lived experiences working under a lens of reproductive justice.

As we navigate the COVID-19 pandemic and the tighter lens of racism, the lessons learned from Tara's are even more important!

42 | When Home Birth Moves to Hospital - Dasia Gant

Dasia Gant was proudly serving in the military as her family was starting to grow. Dasia’s expectations of pregnancy challenged her as she was once a stellar athlete who had thought she would continue to be active and work out. But pregnancy took a toll on her body that she was not ready for, although watching herself grow was still a beautiful time for her family.

While a homebirth were her plans, shifts during her labor required a transfer to the hospital. Upon arrival, she began to feel like she was disconnecting and handing over the reins of her birth to the hospital staff. She requested an epidural to help relax her body and allow the physiologic process of birth to continue. The anesthesiologist started to insert the needle in her back, and she began to feel a hot and tingly sensation going down her back. This would go on six-eight times before her epidural was placed correctly. The experience would mark the shift in her labor that would have lasting physical and mental repercussions for Dasia. Her story is one of resilience, strength, and determination that we easily connect with those who choose to serve.

41 | Inner Strength - Kayla Lucas

Kayla Lucas shared her experiences with both of her sons, being diagnosed with hyperemesis, which made pregnancy physically challenging as she worked to stay healthy and maintain good nutrition and having un-planned inductions. While neither experience was what she expected, she describes them as helping her dig within herself to find a voice to advocate for herself, her strength and determination. Aspects she hopes to encourage others to use in their own birthing experiences.

Postpartum depression would mire her experience as a mother in the months after her birth. She sought support through therapy and was able to come out of it after becoming pregnant again. Kayla's grandmother helped her by acknowledging what her granddaughter was going through. She opened her home to her for respite during the day and watched her son during therapy sessions. Her family gave her time, space, and resources for a time to herself to help relieve anxiety. Kayla wants women to connect with themselves to build self-trust before pregnancy to help them be self-advocates in their care. Find your voice, speak up, and be heard.

38 & 39 | Reimagining the Village - Tayo Mbande & Toni Taylor

The saying goes, "it takes a village to raise a child" - hearing Tayo and her mother share Tayo's birth experience not only affirms this but reveals it takes a village to birth a mother.

Tayo knew for her third pregnancy and birth; she was going to need to facilitate her experience with intense intention. From her previous births, birthing at a hospital was not an option, so with the support of her mother and husband, she prepared to have a family homebirth, absent of a midwife. Yet, this pregnancy was opposite from her others, and there was a point where she thought her homebirth wouldn't come to fruition. Tayo relied heavily on her mother for support throughout her earlier births. This time around, her mother pushed for Tayo and her husband to create a stronger bond they could depend on and believe in each other as a support unit.

Reimagining her village, she let herself to be fully loved and cared for, throughout the pregnancy, her birth, and at the beginning of her postpartum and still currently. Everyone showing up for her makes her show up for herself.

Tayo and Toni have a beautiful bond; they have now created a space to support and uplift the families in their community in that same sacred love. The Chicago Birth Collective is the village, a collective of birth workers, healers, and wellness practitioners serving and healing Black families across Chicago.

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