Posts in COVID-19
174 | Trusting Our Power - Raquel & Chris Williams
174 | Trusting Our Power - Raquel & Chris Williams

The year 2020 will forever be etched in the minds of those who lived to tell the tale. Oh, the stories we will tell. The smoke and mirrors were dispersed and the United States revealed its true self. We bore witness to Riot, after Riot, after Riot. The revolution appeared to be televised after all. But deep in our communities the true revolution was brewing. Many Black women and birthing people continued to give birth despite the headlines, the statistics, and the odds stacked against them. But they didn’t just give birth; they gave birth how they wanted, where they wanted, and focused on what was most important to them.

The Williams chose to keep their pregnancy to themselves aside from their parents. Their birth plans were kept under wraps and allowed them to keep out the noise, opinions, and outside stressors. Chris and Raquel chose a homebirth with a midwife and a doula.

Holistic care equipped Raquel with education, mental fortitude, and an understanding of what childbirth could include. When she started to feel the small ripples of early labor she contacted her birth team which included her midwife, doula, and birth photographer. Chris was spending the day attending graduation ceremonies for his students. Raquel told Chris he was fine to go and she knew it would be fine. They had a late dinner but didn’t set up the birthing tub because it was too late in the day. The waves were not close enough for her to think that she was in active labor. She checked in with her midwife and she told her to use her discernment. Raquel took a Tylenol PM and they enjoyed a movie and facials until she fell asleep. Around four in the morning, Raquel stated that she had to poop. They went down together, Chris could see her from the door, and as Raquel made a maneuver he said, “I don’t think that’s poop.” Chris was scared that the baby had died, due to the shape and stillness of her head. Meanwhile, Raquel was in a calm, zen state as she assured Chris the baby was ok. They were able to Facetime their midwife to manage the delivery of the baby. Chris caught their baby with a nuchal cord and unwrapped it and placed the baby on Raquel’s chest. The midwife entered the house shortly after. Dani and the birth photographer joined them shortly afterward for postpartum support and photography.

Immediately postpartum, they walked back down the hall with their baby. The experience of having their team come to them and the care that was provided for them had them in awe. Raquel believes that everything we need to have children… we already have it. We’ve been having babies like this forever.

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COVID-19, Home Birth, UnassistedLaurel GourrierBlack Maternal Health, Black Doulas, COVID-19, Black Families Matter, Midwifery Care, Unplanned Unassisted BirthComment
173 | The Journey Pregnancy App - Courtney Williams
173 | The Journey Pregnancy App - Courtney Williams

Our guest, CEO of Emagine Solutions Technology Courtney Williams, is the creator of The Journey Pregnancy App. The app enables patients to vital signs during pregnancy and then transmits this information in real-time and creates a record. Beyond that it issues a call to action for users to contact their providers when they enter vitals that are out of bounds based on ACOG standards. This technology was developed after Courtney experienced Postpartum Preeclampsia, a rare condition that occurs when you have high blood pressure and excess protein in your urine soon after childbirth. She was already working in maternal health technology.

Courtney’s pregnancy started in 2019; she gave birth at the height of the first wave of the pandemic in 2020. The pregnancy started well; she ate right and worked out daily. But the gym access stopped due to the pandemic - unfortunately, this was a major stress reliever for Courtney. She also utilized acupuncture with a naturopathic provider. Eventually, she lost access to that support due to growing concerns due to the pandemic. It had been helpful for morning sickness; this was another hit to her emotional support.

A week before the childbirth, Courtney's son measured big and they were scheduled for a surgical birth; which she was ok with because it eased her uncertainty. Unfortunately, the hospital would not allow her doula to be present. Courtney’s husband was her sole support during the birth and everything went well as they welcomed their son. In the hours and days after the birth, her body started swelling. Courtney presented with a headache and pronounced chest pain five days postpartum. She attempted to contact her provider but did not get a response; she decided to go to the emergency room, where she was diagnosed with Postpartum Preeclampsia. After returning home, she needed to report to her doctor’s office multiple days in a week for blood pressure readings. This brought about challenges in their breastfeeding/pumping journey. Courtney was surprised that there wasn't technology to ease the challenges for new parents to go to frequent appointments during the early phases of postpartum.

We will save ourselves. We have everything we need within ourselves to rebuild birth better. Being active participants in our care, engaging providers who acknowledge and respect our voices, and equipping ourselves with innate knowledge and an understanding of how our unique bodies respond to pregnancy are key components in creating safer, joy-filled birth experiences.

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Hospital Birth, Postpartum, Community Highlights, COVID-19, Cesarean BirthLaurel GourrierBirth Advocacy, Birthing During COVID, Birth Tech, Pregnancy Guide, Postpartum Preeclampsia, Surgical BirthComment
162 | Built to Birth - Priya & Harsh Gandhi
162 | Built to Birth - Priya & Harsh Gandhi

With the culmination of a marriage biodata form, a year of cyberstalking, and the power of liquid courage Priya and Harsh finally connected. After a short courtship, they would marry during the Covid-19 pandemic. The couple found out they were expecting their first child while still managing the pandemic and the challenges it would bring to their parenthood journey. They were committed to learning how to prepare for birth.

Due to the nature of the pandemic and limited access to additional hospital guests, Harsh took on the task of learning doula skills. He studied physiological birth and ways to manage the birthing space, which included the BRAIN acronym (Benefits, Risks, Alternatives, Instinct or Intuition, and Nothing). These skills were instrumental in making decisions for Priya and baby as shifts arose.

On the day labor started, they tested their new skills and managed laboring at home until they suspected a ruptured membrane (her water broke). Because they were unsure of the leak, they contacted the hospital and planned to make their way in to check and bring their bags in case they needed to stay. They were informed that it was hospital policy to keep patients whose membranes had ruptured regardless of their stage of labor. Priya and Harsh kept busy by having a dance party and keeping Priya active as much as possible to help the baby engage and progress. Harsh was attentive and helped Priya build her oxytocin levels. She recounted the magical feelings she had with him being there. Their partnership was in full bloom in the birthing space.

After 3-4 hours of pushing and intense back pain, Priya’s provider recommended a surgical birth. Harsh and Priya agreed that after discussing their case and acknowledging all of the hard work she had put in, to make an empowered decision to have a surgical birth. Harsh praised the caregiver team as the surgery was efficient and smooth. They met their son and gently bonded with him as Priya continued to receive care.

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Postpartum, COVID-19, Hospital BirthLaurel GourrierComment
149 | Love is in the Details ~ Oona-Ife & Anthony Olaiya Wright
149 | Love is in the Details ~ Oona-Ife & Anthony Olaiya Wright

Oona-Ife and Anthony were hosting friends at their home when they decided she should take a pregnancy test. She took the test because she had spent the night throwing up after a night of eating steak and butter pecan ice cream. They learned they were expecting a baby, and the news brought so much joy that they had to stifle their excitement from their guests. Anthony even snuck out of the house to shed a few tears as their lives were about to change in this season of expansion.

Despite a rocky start, Oona felt an abundance of self-love and support from her village, which left her with positive reflections regarding her pregnancy. Anthony made space during their journey to learn about what to expect during childbirth and was able to connect with other new and expectant fathers for support. He was intentional about his presence for prenatal visits and building relationships with their care providers.

Labor would gradually commence after a violent bout of nausea and vomiting one evening. Oona-Ife and Anthony would fumble around trying out some tried and true labor strategies that would end in a good laugh and an A for effort. Because they were having a homebirth they were in close contact with their doula and midwifery team about changes in contraction patterns, behaviors, and any concerns they had. As things picked up, their doula would arrive first to assess the scene and encourage them to call the midwife to the house. Laboring and birthing at home proved to be their best decision as it fostered comfort and ease that kept them calm. Despite some hiccups with their tub and a moment of familiar panic for those who needed to relocate during the transition, Oona-Ife would deliver their daughter safely in the water.

The midwives and doula would leave them to bond and care for their new baby and themselves. They would receive a caravan of support with family members arriving at different intervals to visit and provide care over the first month postpartum. Just as they started to get a rhythm at about eight days postpartum Oona-Ife would have severe headaches; she grew concerned regarding her own health. She would eventually go to the hospital for care after connecting with her midwife as her blood pressure elevated to dangerous levels. She would be diagnosed with Postpartum Preeclampsia and Covid-19. Thankfully, she centered her care and was able to heal with continued support from her family and providers.

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Home Birth, Postpartum, Waterbirth, COVID-19Laurel GourrierHome Birth Family, Birth Preparation, Partner Support, Midwifery Care, Doula Support, Postpartum Preeclampsia, Birthing During COVIDComment
145 | Fear & Triumph - Ashlee Grant
145 | Fear & Triumph - Ashlee Grant

Fear and triumph are two words that Ashlee Grant uses to describe her collective birthing experiences. She would navigate the uneasiness of a first pregnancy after miscarriage culminating in a surgical birth of her and her husband's choosing, solidifying their bond as partners. She found the still, small voice that strengthened their resolve.

Ashlee entered the second pregnancy as a new version of herself. She had found her voice after coming to grips with previous trauma and made space to process the layers of her first birth. A deepened knowledge of her body and spirit's needs deepened as her second son grew. She would again seek the support of her sister-in-law as her doula; this time, they had both grown and prepared to bring Ashlee's vision to life. Her doula was now working with ROOTT and had added more perinatal education to her skillset. Complications with the pandemic's beginning presented uncertainty as Ashlee and her husband, Jerod, considered how they would manage if their doula were not present. Thankfully labor would ensue before the hospital's temporary ban on doulas would start.

Ashlee labored at home with her family and doula as planned. The atmosphere was peaceful and undisturbed. They would leave for the hospital when the contractions (surges) were three minutes apart. She arrived in triage and consented to a cervical check that revealed she was 4cm dilated. Instantly defeated and whisked back to the same progression of her first labor Ashlee could feel a shift in her demeanor. Her doula quickly reminded her that it wasn't the same, her body was doing the work, and she would birth the way she wanted to this time. The redirection allowed her to connect to the present and continue balancing movement and rest in the labor room. She had the birth she wanted, delivering a healthy second son, this time without the epidural and minimal interventions.

Today, Ashlee encourages women to find their voices, seek support, and be their own best advocates. She is the host of her own self-coined "preachcast," Planted, where she speaks to the heart of women and opens their eyes to their unique gifting.

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COVID-19, Hospital Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierROOTT Doulas, COVID-19, Black Families MatterComment
144 | Letting Go of Expectations - Danielle Henderson & Shandell Rosa
144 | Letting Go of Expectations - Danielle Henderson & Shandell Rosa

Visualization is a powerful tool, especially for preparing for labor; it can turn our hopes into expectations. Much was the case for Danielle Henderson as she and her husband, Jeff, began preparing for a home birth for their first child.

Danielle created the environment she had envisioned by having calming music and lighting during her labor. The midwife arrived and was deeply committed to being present and supporting Danielle. She even had the support of her mother and sister as planned. Delivery drew out longer than they thought, and there was a family history of short or precipitous labors. However, a tilted uterus would make her work feel more intense and give the feeling that she had progressed. Her mother and sister would eventually leave as time went on. During labor, Danielle found herself coming out of her calmness and felt that hindered her progression. The next day Shandell returned to the porch awaiting the baby’s arrival. Little did she know that she would be entering the birth space. Jeff would ask her to come into the home and support the team. Shandell recalls knowing how vulnerable her sister would feel, and she cautiously stepped in and avoided looking at her to help her maintain her mindset and not face her disappointment. In a word, she held a boundary for her sister while also holding space. Despite having a nuchal arm and double wrapped umbilical cord impeding his descent, Baby Jackson would make a healthy entrance earthside in his parents’ bed.

After her birth, Danielle could feel herself detaching from the experience as she would continue to live where she had delivered her baby. Connecting memories with spaces were hard on her mentally. The newness of motherhood was an adjustment, with full support from her family, and her husband has helped with the adjustment of new motherhood.

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COVID-19, Home Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierHypnobirth, Home Birth Family, Village Support, Partner Support, Long LaborComment
143 | The Journey, the Pain , the Promise - Brittany Turner
143 | The Journey, the Pain , the Promise - Brittany Turner

Before meeting her partner Tony, Brittany Turner didn't think it would be possible for her to have children. After suffering three miscarriages, she had been on a journey to understand the cause of her losses. There is undergoing bloodwork, genetic testing, and numerous ultrasounds, with no definite answer. So when she and Tony decided they were ready to expand their family together, they were pleasantly surprised when she became pregnant. But having both experienced the loss of children, they both were carrying an immense amount of anxiety, at times causing tension between them.

At 34 weeks pregnant - the longest pregnancy she had carried, Brittany noticed that her Braxton Hicks contractions were coming quite frequently. There was an uneasiness that something wasn't right that she was holding. Brittany decided that she would sit with the feeling throughout the night and see how she felt in the morning. But in the morning, the contractions and feelings were still there, accompanied by a small amount of bleeding. Sharing this with Tony, they both decided going in for monitoring would be best.

They did not expect that monitoring would shift to the need for an emergency surgical birth. Brittany reflected that nurses began rushing into her room without warning, explaining to her that due to her son's heart rate dropping, they were going to need to take her to the operating room (OR). Having to be entirely under anesthesia, the last thing Brittany remembers is saying a prayer to God to keep her and her son safe. She awoke, wondering what had happened and where her baby was. And when she was reunited with Tony, he placed their son on her chest - her son placed his little hand on her cheek. A sign that Brittany says was her son telling her that her prayers were answered, and they were ok.

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Cesarean Birth, COVID-19, Hospital Birth, Loss, PostpartumLaurel GourrierEmergency Surgical Birth, Preterm Birth, Preterm BabiesComment
142 | Lessons Learned - Vienna Fernandez
142 | Lessons Learned - Vienna Fernandez

When pregnant with her first child, there was a sense of loneliness. She and her husband lived in a space that wasn't close to family, and working in the city meant a long commute for them—a distraction from being able to be present during her pregnancy. Vienna expressed that it wasn't something she was truly prepared for when reflecting on her birth prep. She knew she wanted to have an unmedicated birth, but when her water broke, and she arrived at the hospital, 4cm dilated, she realized there was much more to the experience than she knew about.

She felt like her care providers weren't communicating well with her throughout her labor about the shifts happening and the interventions provided. As her son was having trouble descending during the pushing phase, her doctor proceeded with an episiotomy and vacuum support - an end to an experience that felt rushed to Vienna and left her confused.

Vienna would hold this memory close when she became pregnant with her second child. From her son's birth, she knew that she hadn't got the support she needed and couldn't trust her care providers to provide the education and advocacy she wanted or deserved. With revelation would be tough as, during her 30-week appointment, they discovered her daughter was measuring small, and close monitoring was needed. Vienna fell into a space of self-doubt and fear and didn't know who to lean to for support. Again wanting an unmedicated birth and knowing somewhat what to expect, she asked all the questions during her birth. And was very vocal about what her body needed. While her daughter came into this world weighing less than 6 pounds, Vienna felt that her voice had been louder and heard in this experience.

Her third birth was the culmination of everything she had taken from her first two births. Navigating changes brought on by the COVID-19 pandemic and the unexpectedness of being pregnant, Vienna hired a doula to help support her. With this birth and pregnancy, she was able to be much more in tune with her body and how this birth would look and feel. Each one of her births had been a deep lesson. Not only in how she wanted her births to be but ultimately how she wants to show us as a mother and for herself.

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Hospital Birth, COVID-19, PostpartumLaurel GourrierBirth Trauma, Healing, Birth Preparation, Postpartum SupportComment
139 | Birth Beyond the Status Quo - Ashlee Johnson
139 | Birth Beyond the Status Quo - Ashlee Johnson

Ashlee Johnson's passion for birthwork grew from her first pregnancy and childbirth. She would bring forth life three times with a dedicated birth team. She welcomed being pregnant and can recall the first pregnancy as an enjoyable time despite hearing so many negative stories that people felt compelled to share with her. It would be a chance encounter, during her first pregnancy, with one woman that listened to her birth preferences and encouraged her to go for it. She let that affirmation set within her and committed to honoring her own plans.

This foundation would serve her throughout the births of her other two children. Ashlee and her husband prepared by attending birth classes and feeling fully supported in a birth center and homebirth care. She describes her births as amazing because she felt educated, had a positive attitude, and had a birth team that met her expectations. In the early postpartum days, breastfeeding was challenging due to latch issues. Yet, Having set up a solid support system, she overcame the learning curves, focused on her healing, and addressed her postpartum depression. For Ashlee, preparation is vital, expressing that no matter if birth plans shift, if you've prepared, you're in a better position to steer things your way.

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Birth Center, Home Birth, COVID-19, Postpartum, WaterbirthLaurel GourrierBirth Preparation, Postpartum Mental Health, Postpartum Planning, Home Birth Family, Birth CenterComment
138 | A Journey of Unwavering Submission - Ashley & Adrian Cleckley
138 | A Journey of Unwavering Submission - Ashley & Adrian Cleckley

During a global pandemic, Ashley and Adrian would welcome their first child while living in the United Arab Emirates (UAE). The safety and travel restrictions limited their access to their family, causing Ashley to feel immediately dependent on her doctor. Despite being inclined to more natural resources for medical support, she felt that pregnancy made her want to stick to what the doctor said they needed. Ashley started to shift back to her first thoughts about her health, rooted in natural medicine. An unmedicated birth would be explored to match their personal preferences. She and Adrian weren't sure if a natural birth could be possible, as they didn't know if they could or if Ashley could endure it. After careful consideration, they hired a doula hoping to have support with their birth plan. Cesarean birth, epidurals, and a fear of dying in childbirth were the only knowledge Ashley started with as she and her husband started their first pregnancy. Their doula educated them about pregnancy and childbirth, which helped dismantle her fears and feel more empowered. The quest for knowledge began, and when Ashley shared mind shifts with her doctor, there was also a shift in the doctor's countenance toward's their birth plan. The doctor was dismissive and resistant to her preferences and started fear-mongering tactics to alter their plans. Adrian shared that he felt angry during the doctor's appointment because they had intentionally researched and devised their birth plan. He settled himself, and he felt his family was losing control of the situation. The birth team had to change, and it did change; they found a new doctor and hospital that could meet their needs.

Pregnancy became more challenging as their household tested positive for Covid-19 at 37 weeks gestation. A new fear presented itself, as she prayed the baby would not come while she was feeling sick and too tired to care for a newborn. Thankfully Adrian was asymptomatic and could complete the baby preparation tasks, and Ashley would feel better when she went into labor. Another issue did arise as her doctor attended to a family emergency, and they didn't know if she would make it back for the delivery.

When labor day arrived, Ashley tuned in with herself and listened to her body as they managed the day. Nesting set in, and Ashley emailed her birth plan to the hospital as early labor began. She prepared her hair for delivery, as Black women do in preparation for a new baby. She labored at home with the support of Adrian and her doula throughout the next 23 hours. They decided to check in at the hospital and soon discovered that everyone on her service had a copy of her birth plan. Ashley would explore her options for comfort measurements with her supportive birth team. The labor had drawn out so long that exhaustion shifted her mindset, and Adrian hit his daddy doula stride to help her overcome. He stepped out in the hallway to talk to the nurse to support the plan. Ashley found herself in a meditative state as she wrestled with the tiredness of her body and the intensity of labor. She would grapple with decisions that were altering her birth experience that didn't reflect her true wishes. Calmness came from sinking within and tapping into God as a source that allowed her to go through it. She began pushing without prompting or permission. Ashley allowed her body to lead and deliver her son into the world after 32 hours of labor. She was amazed by her strength and the process of childbirth.

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COVID-19, Hospital Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierBirthing During COVID, Doula Support, Birth Options, Postpartum SupportComment
136 | Receiving Energy from Water - Adenike & Brandi
136 | Receiving Energy from Water - Adenike & Brandi

Their pregnancy journey involved five tries with Intrauterine Insemination (IUI). After two unsuccessful attempts at home, they decided to get support at a specialized clinic. They had a Nigerian nurse practitioner during the first two tries at the clinic (Adenike is of Nigerian and Haitian descent). Still, it would be the fifth try to become pregnant ultimately.

For Adenike, the pregnancy itself would be pretty "straightforward" the most challenging part was managing her Sickle Cell Anemia. Individuals with this diagnosis can have low birth weight babies due to the birthing person cells being shaped differently and how their body carries oxygen. For Adenike, this meant the need to get red blood cell exchanges completed once a month. Due to Covid, she was attending these appointments alone, spending four to five hours getting blood pumped in and out of her body. While a tasking endeavor, Adenike expressed that care providers like to tell you what you can do with your body in terms of Sickle Cell care. That was not the route that she and Brandi wanted for her pregnancy and birth. They leaned into the research they had done and the support of their doula to ensure every step of the way, Adenike was able to support her body in the way she understood her needs.

Adenike's pregnancy was considered high risk due to her Sickle Cell diagnosis paired with other health concerns. Taking that into account, her maternal-fetal medicine (MFM) doctor (also Nigerian) discussed with Adenike and Brandi that it might be safest to have an induction at 38 weeks. As the time came around, they could push this time frame back as her body and baby were managing well. After their appointment and returning home, Adneike and Brandi settled into their nightly routine, with Brandi taking their dogs on a walk. As she stepped out, she noticed a drizzle of rain, along with a woman she hadn't seen before sitting about 20 ft away. Brandi shares in a greeting with her, and the lady exclaims, "You know it's raining outside!" throwing Brandi off a bit as it wasn't raining that hard. Continuing on her walk, she was baffled when she saw the lady get up and begin walking away into the distance with no known end. Returning home, she shared this interaction with Brandi, but they both shrugged it off as they went to bed, but soon after, Adenike felt a sudden sharp pain and gush from her waters breaking.

Labor would take its time, the rain increasing into a torrential downpour as they made their way to the hospital. As they moved through their birth, some shifts were required from their birth plan, along with hard discussions and push back from their care team. Through it all, Adenike stayed in tune with her needs, and when she was ready to push, she followed her intuition, bringing her daughter hearthside as the rain came pouring down a reminder they were covered and held.

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COVID-19, Hospital Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierDoula Support, Ancestral Support, Ancestral Traditions, Sickle Cell Anemia, IUI, Birthing With IntuitionComment
135 | The Impact of Village: Rebirth of the Mother - Dr. Vernette Kountz
135 | The Impact of Village: Rebirth of the Mother - Dr. Vernette Kountz

With many stories to share, Dr. Vernette reflected with us on her most recent birth, her seven-month-old son Hudson. Understanding her birth experience with him began way before now. At sixteen, she got pregnant; however, her family was adamant that the choice to be made was termination. This decision would include a deep grieving process but set the stage for the subsequent important choices in her life. When she got pregnant again at 20, her mindset was clear; she was keeping this baby, the beginning process of finding her voice, especially in her womb.

Dr. Vernette had always known she had a calling to surrogacy, even before the birth of her first son - because she had "took life from her womb," she "wanted to give life." Working with a surrogacy agency, she was clear about the parameters of her surrogacy journey; staying clear about them allowed her to build an authentic relationship with the fathers of the twins. Upon meeting each other, they all immediately aligned, and in building a relationship that felt true for the three of them, she is still involved in the girl's life, with periodic calls and check-ins. Most notably, her surrogacy journey was the turning point for her about being intentional in setting intentions for the journey of carrying and birthing life. So in September 2020, when she became pregnant with her son Hudson she had a solid template to work from in building her birth team and navigating her pregnancy and birth.

Her birth team included her doula, birth photographer, three black midwives, and a friend serving as a maternal figure (filling the space of her mother and godmother who had passed). She shared the sentiment with all of them that she needed "to be mothered" for this journey. Throughout the birth, they did this, a moment that she recalls vividly is laboring in the birth pool, and whenever she reached out for support or comfort, there was always someone there. That support gave her the freedom to listen to her body - laboring on the toilet, utilizing movement, and when she felt the need to push, doing it without hesitation. Following the guidance of her midwife, she took a deep breath and pushed Hudson out. The final push to a birthing journey free of limitations!

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Abortion, Birth Center, Hospital Birth, COVID-19, Twins, Postpartum, AdoptionLaurel GourrierBlack Midwives, Black Motherhood, Black Doulas, Perinatal Mental Health, Maternal Mental Health, Maternal ChiropractorComment
134 | Making Peace with the Unknown - Ivory & Ernest Levert Jr.
134 | Making Peace with the Unknown - Ivory & Ernest Levert Jr.

For Ivory and Ernest a previous miscarriage had introduced a fear of pregnancy loss that loomed for a while. Their healing has enabled them to share their story with grace and humility. As the pregnancy thrived, Ivory and Ernest began to manage and prepare for childbirth. They hired a ROOTT perinatal support doula to support their pregnancy. They were able to start working with their doula in the critical stages of the first trimester and all the way through labor and immediate postpartum. Ivory always knew she wanted to work with a ROOTT doula and found it helpful to process her feelings and birth plans in the early stages with someone else.

Ivory utilized our podcast to listen to a slew of birth stories to learn what possibilities could present when labor started. An online childbirth education helped them learn even more about expectations and how labor could unfold. Ivory felt empowered with her newly gained knowledge. Ernest graciously shared that he was not emotionally invested in how the pregnancies would go, as he tends to stay in the now. His parenthood journey grew slowly as they got closer to their due date. Ernest started a grieving process of shifting his identity to make space for a new baby. Leaning into the voices of friends that are fathers, he learned to fill the gaps and help with managing stress for Ivory.

When labor started, Ivory texted her doula and Ernest that she was cramping. She wanted to stay active and decided to take a walk and spend some time with her husband at home as she wanted to stay relaxed. Contractions picked up, and they chose to report to the hospital to see how labor was progressing. Labor would go on longer than anticipated, but with the support of Ernest and their doula, Faith, Ivory endured. She gave birth to their daughter and immediately began her breastfeeding journey.

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COVID-19, Hospital Birth, Loss, PostpartumLaurel GourrierROOTT Doulas, Miscarriage Stories, Birth Preparation, Partner Support, Midwife, Doula of Color, Community SupportComment
133 | Birthing in the Body - Gianna Fay
133 | Birthing in the Body - Gianna Fay

Gianna Fay, a Certified Nurse Midwife (CNM), tapped into herself as a resource as she ventured into her pregnancies. She also called upon people she had connected with along her journey as a birthworker. She started her first pregnancy living and working in Alaska. Gianna had access to the military base for care and where she worked. Allowing her to try out "centering pregnancy" at the base and thought it was a good option for them to allow her to "be the person pregnant." "Centering Pregnancy" is the process of having private physical exams completed by CNM's and doing all the other care as a group with other pregnant people. Other preparation included working out and curating a birth team to support her preferences. At the end of her third trimester, introspection through journaling and reading lots of positive birth stories (as a CNM, this helped clear her mind of all the things she sees daily). Gianna knew that she wanted to be in labor land, wanted to be a midwife and experience birth in her body with no interventions if possible.

After carefully planning and preparing for her pregnancy and labor support, she went into labor at 39 weeks three days with a huge gush of fluid in bed that woke her up. Labor moved faster than expected, and she welcomed her healthy son after managing her own choices.

Gianna and Evan discovered they were expecting again at the beginning of the Covid-19 pandemic. They would welcome their second child as an unexpected blessing after experiencing the joy of their first child's birth. They were no longer living in Alaska and transitioning into new roles and responsibilities. Gianna desired to birth in a natural birth center, especially as she met most of the criteria to qualify for a low intervention experience. But her fetal growth ultrasound indicated severe intrauterine growth restriction. A wave of emotions began to move through Gianna as her midwife brain and birthing person brain started to conflict. She sought a second opinion and started to utilize her resources again to manage her care. However, she had unintentionally pushed the first domino, leading to a cascade of interventions. She would have an induction that tested her patience and will. She did not experience labor land or even feel like she was in her body like her birth with Jacob. Gianna had to pause and reset before going further down the road of interventions. The reset worked, and baby Elijah was born healthy and was not small, which confirmed what she knew in her heart.

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COVID-19, Hospital Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierBlack Midwives, Certified Nurse Midwife, Induction, Intrauterine Growth Restriction (IUGR), Tearing During Birth, Birth Preparation, Maternal Mental HealthComment
132 | Trusting the Surrender ~ Aureyl Pitts-Thomas
132 | Trusting the Surrender ~ Aureyl Pitts-Thomas

Having had a chemical pregnancy before, Aureyl held onto a lot of fear about her health and its correlation to how this pregnancy would continue. Not feeling supported by her care provider, she reached out to two of her dear friends who also happened to be doulas at the time with the local doula organization Restoring Our Own Through Transformation (ROOTT). This additional layer of support gave her the tools to switch to a new care provider that was perfect for her family. Her doula also guided her in managing her hyperemesis gravidarum diagnosis. In a conversation with her doula, she realized that she had to address the fear she had about her body. Her doula explained that she couldn't "operate in both." She had to be either affirming that she was truly capable or sit alongside the fear. Aureyl realized she had to do the work and shared from then that her pregnancy and birth would have a theme of continued surrender - surrendering to her body, words, and thoughts about what her experience should be.

On Sept. 13th, 2020, around midnight, Aureyl went to the bathroom and noticed some fluid with a pink tinge. Having done in-depth prep with her doula about what to expect when labor began, Aureyl was pretty confident her waters had broken. She informed her doula, her family, and care provider and went back to bed to try and rest. The following day with the support of her doula, they tried to help labor progress with movement, continued to monitor the amount of fluid she was losing (as she had a small leak), along with her temperature and baby's heartbeat. After 24 hours of this routine, they decided to head to the hospital. The hospital birth team informed Aureyl she would need to get a cervical check to confirm that her waters had broken and how her body was progressing. This check was extremely painful for her, and after hearing that she was only 1cm dilated, she expressed feeling a sense of deep discouragement, and the tinges of distrust of her body began rising again. Discussing options with her birth team, she decided to rest, and as she continued to move through her birth, the trust of surrendering she had put in her pregnancy would still ring true.

Aureyl had to ask herself to surrender to the shifts of her birth; this included the support of Pitocin to help her progress. The guidance from her doctor in getting an epidural to ease her distress with cervical checks and the later part of her labor was supportive. And ultimately, meeting her baby on Sept. 15th through a surgical birth was what was aligned for them. Reflecting on her experience, Aureyl indicates that she could be at peace with each of those decisions as they were all made on her terms. And she looks back on her experience in awe of how beautiful it was for her.

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COVID-19, Hospital Birth, Loss, Postpartum, Cesarean BirthLaurel GourrierROOTT Doulas, Doula of Color, Black Doulas, Doula Support, Black Birth Matters, Maternal Mental Health, Birth Plan Shifts, Trust Birth, Surgical BirthComment
130 | Birth Rooted Overseas - Rokhaya Ndiaye
130 | Birth Rooted Overseas - Rokhaya Ndiaye

With a history of irregular menstrual cycles, Rokhaya decided to download an app to help her track them better. In early December, she was surprised to get a notification that her cycle was three days late. Ignoring it for a little bit, but with time passing and no change, Rokhaya and her husband found out they would be expecting on Christmas day. Restrictions from the pandemic would require a 14-day quarantine and needed to get the COVID vaccine if they decided to travel back to Canada. Wanting to wait out her options, Rokhaya paused on that decision. With her first trimester having some challenges, her doctors recommended she should not travel if possible. Moving into her second trimester, she focused on preparing for her birth, but by the time things began reopening, she was past the point of travel being safe, and Jamaica became the place their birth story would occur.

Five days past her estimated due date, Rokhaya began having light contractions about 7-9 minutes apart. With things progressing quickly, Rokhaya and her husband decided to head to the hospital. Upon being admitted, Rokhaya was 6cm, and her water broke shortly after. Reflecting on her birth, Rokhaya thought her son would have come earlier than he did. She had done so much work on focusing on coping with the pain; she couldn't listen to her body that her baby was ready to come earthside. It wasn't until the nurse told her her baby's head was out that she focused, and within three pushes, "prince" Ali was born.

In the immediate postpartum, Rokhaya felt comforted by the community of women she was surrounded by - as, in Jamaica, there aren't separate quarters, and the women all stay together. Ali was born unresponsive, and after having a couple of seizures, the doctors wanted to keep him for monitoring. For Rokhaya, she could not have her golden hour and was discharged without him for ten days. The first 6-7 weeks were hard for her, navigating her healing, Ali's recovery, and breastfeeding. She and her husband found that when they were able to listen to Ali, the better they did, being able to communicate and figure out what he needed allowing them to find their footing in parenthood.

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COVID-19, Hospital Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierBlack Families Matter, Black Mamas Matter, Birthing During COVID, HypnobirthComment
129 | Victorious Together - Chelsea Butler
129 | Victorious Together - Chelsea Butler

Chelsea always knew that her first child would be a son. However, she couldn't predict the circumstances of when she would become pregnant. A global pandemic would bring her aspirations of acting to a screeching halt as production stopped. She shifted gears as she needed to prepare for caring for herself and a new baby. Emotional issues developed as her relationship with her partner deteriorated. She felt alone. Depression set in, and conflict with friends and family grew.

Elevated blood pressure, news that the baby was determined to be large for his gestational age, and gestational diabetes concerns overshadowed her birth plan hopes. Her provider started discussing a surgical birth before she had an opportunity to labor. She disagreed with her OB/GYN's preeclampsia diagnosis and decided to change from hospital birth to a birth center that could support her plans. The midwives at the birth center agreed to accept her for care. She didn't feel connected to them or fully confident about the birthing space, but she pushed forward as it seemed like a better option than the hospital.

Chelsea's membranes ruptured, and she contacted the birth center. She was told to rest and give herself time, and she eventually went in to have her fluid tested for amniotic fluid. After two days of leaking and intense back pain, she contacted the midwives, and they told her to wait again. She reported to the birth center on the third day, and her rupture was confirmed. However, she had not dilated despite feeling like her body had completed a lot of work. She kept herself active and wanted to use water therapy to support her comfort. She would manage the labor, but her cervix did not dilate. She would eventually transfer to the hospital to manage the rest of her labor. The hospital shift was challenging mentally and physically. Chelsea reached ten cms and immediately started to push even though her son was still high in her pelvis. A surgical birth became her last option, and it was quickly discovered that her baby had swallowed meconium and had fluid in his lungs. In addition, she had nearly hemorrhaged. She reflected on the intensity and degree of interventions in the hospital; everything she had wanted for her birth had crumbled. She felt disconnected from the people caring for her and the space she was in.

Carrying all of the trauma home with her new baby would be a rollercoaster. Therapy and group support have helped. She has also connected with the women in her family to help build her connections and heal. Healing comes one day at a time with intention.

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Cesarean Birth, COVID-19, Hospital Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierPerinatal Support, Perinatal Mental Health, Surgical Birth, Postpartum Mental Health, Birth Trauma, Healing, Postpartum HemorrhageComment
128 | Mothering the Mother - Megana Dwarakanath
128 | Mothering the Mother - Megana Dwarakanath

Megana knew that she wanted a family, and before meeting her husband, she had even considered taking on the role of parenting without a partner. But soon after moving to a new city, she met her husband; they fell in love and began discussing expanding their family. They both wanted to have two kids before Megana got a bit older and had planned to start trying to conceive after getting married. But their March 2020 wedding was canceled due to the beginnings of the COVID-19 pandemic, leading them to move forward with a small ceremony and begin trying to conceive in May.

As a healthcare worker (pediatrician), Megana was aware of the studies around birthing folks in her field having two times the rate of infertility than others. Many of her friends in residency with her had shared their struggles with infertility. With that in mind, she was emotionally prepared to have some struggles of her own with conceiving but was grateful that she was pregnant within three months of trying. The beginning of her pregnancy was layered with many parts. They were going to be moving cross country; she had lost both her grandparents, dealing with the pandemic and also working through the pandemic and didn't fully have care established where they were moving; Megana describes that time as "surreal."

Amongst her birth preparation, she was journaling, reading, and listening to positive birth stories and remained active, running up to her 39th week of pregnancy. Her due date came and went, making Megana uneasy as she knew she was losing time from her maternity leave. Her jobs maternity leave policy would give her 12 weeks, and she had already begun using some time waiting on the arrival of her baby. Taking that into consideration, Megana elected to support her progress with an induction. Induction included two doses of misoprostol, moving her quickly into intense labor. Reviewing all her options and managing the frequency and intensity of her contractions, which had started putting her baby in distress - Megana decided to have an epidural to provide them some rest and allow her body the space it needed to continue to progress. After about an hour and a half of pushing, her daughter was born. Megana did suffer from a 2nd/3rd-degree periclitoral and labial tear, which would impact her in ways she wasn't prepared for.

Within her great support village, Megana's sister would be the guiding light in helping her navigate all the new transitions. The reality of how debilitating her tear was, combined with the level of rest she needed and what maternity leave entailed for caring and bonding with her daughter Megana was falling into a postpartum anxiety/depression cycle. With the support of her sister, they established some concrete strategies to guide her through this time and enable her healing.

Megana's journey with an extremely short maternity leave due to the American Board of Pediatrics policies has led her to be a driving force for changing maternity leave policy. She wrote an oped that has changed policies in her department and has a postpartum group for other South Asian women to discuss some of the cultural misogyny and expectations they contend with. Check these essential resources out in the show notes.

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COVID-19, Hospital Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierBirthing During COVID, Postpartum Anxiety, Postpartum Mental Health, Postpartum Depression, Postpartum Support, Community Support, Maternity Leave, Tearing During Birth, Healthcare Worker, InductionComment
127 | Friendship to Family - Giánni & Ron
127 | Friendship to Family - Giánni & Ron

Giánni and Ron expanded their family in 2019 and 2020, welcoming two beautiful daughters to fortify their new marriage. They were already parents building their blended family, but these pregnancies connected all of the dots and allowed them both to journey through the highs and lows of creating a new life together. They were both interested in having mature and intentional pregnancy experiences.

The first pregnancy was without complications, and Giánni was able to have the labor and delivery she had hoped for. Upon learning she was pregnant again shortly after her birth, Giánni and Ron paused and carefully considered if and how they would move forward with this pregnancy. She had made plans for her life's next steps and knew that committing to bring forth another life could prompt her to delay some of her dreams. They chose to maintain the pregnancy as their family members had recently endured the loss of an infant due to stillbirth. They felt called and chosen to accept this gift.

Giánni's second pregnancy occurred as the pandemic was shifting the daily lives of everyone. It brought health challenges that would make the pregnancy hard on her physically and mentally - including not knowing if Ron would be present for the birth. He had fallen ill around the same time as her induction and was admitted to the same hospital. She had the support of her ROOTT doula but was thankful that Ron would be discharged, joining her for the birth of their child within a couple of hours of her delivery. She would continue to have to monitor her health to stabilize her blood pressure with the support of the doctor and doula as they continued postpartum care.

Vulnerability was and has been the key to working as a team and building a solid foundation for their family. Ron articulated the need for fathers to have spaces to come without pretense or thought about who they are, their occupations, or social status. He also acknowledged the need for partners to create space for their wives to have time for themselves to recharge and work on their dreams. Giánni and Ron were able to come to each other with their needs by defaulting to the friendship they had before marriage. Giánni exclusively breastfed, and she found herself often feeling "touched out." Ron stepped in to help with researching and supporting Giánni until she was able to build herself up as well. Balancing four children proved to be challenging as they all needed something different from their parents. Breakdowns come, and they have kept up their communication and are persevering.

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COVID-19, Hospital Birth, Loss, PostpartumLaurel GourrierROOTT Doulas, Black Doulas, Birthing During COVID, Miscarriage Stories, Stillbirth, Blended Family, Postpartum SupportComment
122 | To the Moon & Back - Alicia Tetteh
122 | To the Moon & Back - Alicia Tetteh

Alicia Tetteh joins us for a second time after sharing her twin birth with us in Episode 57: The Body Holds the Score. Alicia and her husband, Solomon, discovered they were expecting their third child during the pandemic shutdown of 2020. Luna was a surprise for them but came with a new and experienced version of Alicia.

Alicia started with a previous hospital for care but added midwifery support as she considered birthing at home. After garnering support from Solomon, she began planning an intentional homebirth with a Black midwife for the pregnancy. Despite finding a Black midwife, she had difficulty finding Black birthers who had experienced a homebirth to offer additional support. They worked towards preparation for the birth by reading and leaning into the midwife to answer her questions.

Alicia admits that there were some unrealistic expectations about laboring at home that didn’t match the visuals in her mind or on social media. Labor started after a family walk through a petting zoo. When they arrived home, Alicia found herself unable to relax and move through the pain of the contractions. Her choices regarding food, music, and creating her environment ranked high on what she was thankful for. She contributes Solomon and Jesus for her ability to deliver their baby girl at home without medication. Her previous twin birth was a surgical delivery, and she had been numbed through the physical feelings of delivery.

Preparation for birth was high on the list; however, postpartum planning took a backseat. Alicia found herself unprepared, despite the memories of her twin birth recovery. The physicality of birth was heavy on Alicia’s body. There was support from family, friends, and their doula in the first couple of weeks. After the first month, sleep routines and managing twin toddlers took over their world. Solomon and Alicia have managed their “new normal” with teamwork and genuine co-parenting. Alicia wants moms to maintain their sense of self and have an identity outside of motherhood that helps them experience the joys of life.

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Home Birth, COVID-19, Postpartum, VBACLaurel GourrierVBAC, COVID-19, Midwifery Care, Doula Support, Postpartum Planning, Postpartum Support, Home Birth FamilyComment